I Can Has Google?
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Nope. No I didn’t. I didn’t just start off this article with a pop-culture reference. The next thing I’ll be mentioning the dramatic chipmunk as a factual recreation of Halo 3’s ability to destroy my productivity. BUM-BUM-BUH!
[ Focus Farkas ]
*AHEM* Hello humans. Do you have a website? Chances are you do. And what is the best news if you’re looking to bring other interested humans in (and a few robots)? Totally being Google’s best friend forever (BFF for the informed). The good news is that it looks like Google has a crush on us. A hard-on raging crush that is only quenched by throwing souls into our cauldron of malcontent. A surprisingly colorful cauldron on malcontent I might add.
There are two reasons for this post, one is to share the funny search terms Google associates with us and the other is to share how I got here. From my experience these tips will work for practically any site and bring up up in the karma engines. And it takes a few days of plugging away to get some basic results, so no need to quit your day jobs.
I’ve ranked them in order from “makes sense” to “holy crap I have to take a screenshot of this”. I only included the first page results though they may have changed since I wrote them down:
fil and kirby
8-bit Kirby
super funny comic strips
funny comic rss
pretty comic strips (awwww…)
comic book strips
funny comic tale
countrywide comic strips
nes game covers
peer pressure comics
funny psychological comics
comic strip dashboard widget
funny comic strips pictures
world war funny comic
retirement home comics
The reason I wrote this article:
funny pirates speech, #1 in Google (AHAHAHAHAHA!)
Second reason:
help me make a funny comic strip, #2 in Google right above Scott Adam’s Dilbert Blog (WTF?!!)
The trifecta of insanity:
funny comic strips about Jesus, #3 in Google just below XKCD and Penny Arcade! (I bet they were disappointed)
Final Irony:
Create a Halo Comic Strip, If they only knew about my addiction to the shiny rings
“How’d you do this Farkas? Give me your mind Farkas! I MUST HAVE IT TO COMPLETE MY GARDENING WITH KITTENS SITE.” Cool. Cool. Okay. Three simple things. First build tons of links back to your site. It helps to make the link a name of a keyword you had in mind. For example, Funny Comic Strips. Build links in Forums, Blogs, other sites, and in search engines. This link is great to find more places to submit to: 99 ways to promote your website. I’ve spent many hours making posts with links back to here in hopes I’ll steal some sweet link juice from Google. And promote your RSS feed to feed search engines. Every new post means links from their site, which means continued world domination.
Second, remove the crap you have in your Website Title in the browser. Make it unique. Do searches and try and pick an honest fight. Using keywords with 60 million results means you will be 50 pages in and unheard of.
Finally, improve your code. Add meta tags, reduce clutter, and make important search text bold. If you are using Wordpress use these two plug-ins as a supplement: All in One SEO & Head Meta Descriptions. They do a really great job of doing some dynamic ninja-ing behind the scenes which will ensure your pages have unique content according to the big Goog.
Thank you for listening to my rant. I hope it was worthwhile! Also, I’m clearly quite a bit behind this week in posting but I’ll be back in form with a new EXTRA GIANT comic tomorrow. One of these days I’ll talk about Phi and why it is the best thing an artist can know to help their composition. Stay tuned!
[ EDIT: HOLY MOLY. I just did a quick search and this is now the number one result for funny comic strips about jesus. I bet like five people search that per day. Take that religion! Who's God do you believe in now?! Oh, and Happy Birthday Goog. Your present is in the mail. *sigh, this is so pathetic* ]
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